Day 2 day started with breathing exercises and meditation in the am. After doing the deep breathing breath retention I still could not pass the 3 minute mark. Afterwards we practiced the deep breathing meditation technique at which point I got my oxygen level so high that my hands and all the way up to my arm started cramping. I literally felt like I was paralyzed for 2 to 3 minutes. My hands were stuck and I looked like a crippled T-rex. This was scary! In the midst of my mini-panic I sat up and asked Wim if this was normal and he nodded his head yes and said to just continue. He said if I was uncomfortable I could always stop breathing so aggressively and allow the carbon dioxide come back in my blood stream and my hands would loosen up. I was scared so I took a pause and within 2 minutes just as he said everything loosened up and I was back to normal. After that, I kept going, admittedly tentatively but forward nonetheless.
I started feeling intense tremors going through my legs all the way down to my feet and then alternating back up to my arms and back through my legs. Afterwards we spoke about it and he said those are blockages. The more uncomfortable physical sensations you have the more blockages you have. Unlike many other types of spiritual cleansing where you have to dig in and understand where the blockages come from, this practice is a sort of a shortcut as he described it.
You open up parts of your brain and electrical currents cleanse all blockages regardless where they come from. After you release them he says that the source will reveal itself but knowing the source before unblocking in unnecessary. “Save money in therapy and just breathe” he said. This way you can live free and clear if you do enough work. The next step is to unlock the deeper portions of the brain. He said we needed to shed the neo-cortex layer and go into the mammalian brain and then shed even that and dig into the last level getting to the pituitary gland and brain-stem which apparently you can literally see with your eyes closed if you really get deep enough. Not there yet but plugging along and apparently I have a ton of blockages to release but we’re getting there! Strange, I thought I was perfect already, perhaps not lol? Hopefully today’s cold exercises go better than yesterday.
As a footnote I stayed up late drinking and snacking with Wim and a few other people into the wee hours of the night. I think it’s really cool that Wim is a normal guy who drinks beer and coffee but is also incredibly active and focused. It just goes to show that it’s not all diet, our minds have much more power from a quantum perspective than I gave credit for. So much of my research and belief in the power of quantum reality was more academic. Seeing it in practice with Wim has been really refreshing. According to Wim, you can alkalize your body with your mind and breath as opposed to having to focus so much on an alkaline diet. That’s not to say that it’s not important to eat well, but again this just highlights the power of the mind and breath.
At breakfast we all shared experiences from the morning meditation and it turns out that many people I spoke with also felt the frozen paralysis in their hands and arms and a couple even experienced it up to their necks and even mouth and yet they continued to keep on going with it and digging deeper into the meditation. A couple of people also reported seeing the pituitary light! After knowing that we are all going through the same thing I am much more confident to move forward and dig deeper into the meditation tomorrow. I was afraid of going home looking like a T-rex for life but now that I am assured that it is all temporary and somewhat normal I plan to rally dig in harder.
Angelique told me that she held her breath during the retention exercise for 8 minutes. She was completely surprised by this. She was also so humble in demeanor that she did not even tell Wim or really even want anyone to know. This underscores the general mentality here. No one is competing; it’s all about personal growth relative to our own individual experiences. While others serve as inspiration, there is no competition. That said, 8 minutes is hard for me to even fathom as I’m stuck at just below 3 minutes. Perhaps if I relax and let go more I can and will go deeper… We shall see!
Today for our first cold exercise we did 25 minutes standing in the cold outside barefoot in horse stance. Overall I felt better than yesterday, I think, except my pinky toe turned yellow for over 30 minutes and wouldn’t change back, I had to take a warm shower for 20 mins do change the color but now it’s back!!! It turned white during the outside exercise so I was worried about frostbite but I finished it and no frost bite 🙂 Intense …
Our second cold exercise is a late night dip into the freezing cold moving water like yesterday, felt better this time! We carried torches so we could see and the cameras were all running. It was a bit less organized and somewhat theatrical with the torches and cameras but it was awesome nonetheless. Upon thinking about it while I am happy for Wim that he and this method is getting the proper publicity I really don’t like the cameras. I want to go inwards and not think about what others think and cameras are no good for that. Perhaps I need to look at it as an even bigger challenge to do that despite the cameras. Everything happens for a reason and I am right here where I need to be so I need to stop thinking and focus on just being, here, in the moment.
After coming in and warming up we did a breathing exercise to oxygenate the blood and then dove into a push-up test to see if we could do more push-ups that usual while oxygenated. Although I’m not in Cross-Fit shape at the moment I keep myself relatively fit so I was able to do well over 50 push-ups without much of a struggle. I ran out of breath before my muscles gave in which was pretty awesome because normally a set of 50 good perfect form push-ups is usually enough to really breakdown my chest but after that set I was totally fine and ready for more. I am a bit out of shape relative to my normal fitness standards so I think I would normally have felt this way after only 30 or so. I have been playing with the breathing and exercise for a while and I know that breathing really helps, this was a big re-affirmation which was awesome.
Turns out I did the most push-ups of the group in the oxygen retention workout test which made me feel pretty good for a moment. Later I reflected on this and realized that I need to let go of my ego more. I judge too much of life based on how I rank against others rather than being only focused on myself. I felt like a failure because I was the only one with yellow toes and then like a hero for being the strongest with pushups when I need to feel good about myself despite my “rank” or what I am able to do or not do. I still have a lot of internal work to do.. I will say that at least being conscious of these things will allow me to change it over time. I need to stay mindful of being okay with who I am and what I do as long as I am putting forth my 110%.
Day 2 concluded with an amazing chat with Owen (the burly Welsh Doctor that looks like a hatchet wielding warrior from the movie “Brave Heart” and in many ways is, except for his kind spirit and brilliant mind) Dennis, (engineer from Belgium who is amazingly introspective and wise with a personality and sense of humor that instantly lights up a room) and my Irish friend Dara (incredibly well read and deeply informed on almost everything, spiritually grounded and meditates constantly) about relinquishing ego but using it as a tool that can help to motivate others. We all went into our personal stories and my crazy story regarding family lineage and drama took the cake for most interesting and rare and made for a great conversation! From bankers turned yoga teachers to ex-oil execs turned fitness experts, this group is nothing short of amazing!